I'm not going to beat around the bush...I have been binging constatly lately. I haven't been able to get through one day without a binge. I realize that I get very overwhelmed with life and when things bother me I don't always realize it's bothering me. I turn to food almost instantly. I don't even realize until i'm eating and at that point sometimes I don't care, I just want to feel better.
The problem is that it always makes me feel so much worse after that sugar high wears off. It leaves me feeling depressed and hopeless. I feel like I have made so much progress in the past few months but in the past two weeks it feels like I have taken 10 steps back.
I haven't been blogging or journaling much about my feelings lately. I have to remember how important that is. I also think it's time for me to re-read intuitive eating. I have to remind myself of what "real" hunger is. I have lost that over these past two weeks.
I actually set myself up big time today. I baked a small batch of peanut butter cookies 8 to be exact, it is now 3:20 and I have eating all 8! This is so hard for me to admit but that's the truth. I feel kinda sick now.
Here is to starting over, I can't give up. I know that one day this will all fall into place.